New Skin

If you could spend the next year as someone radically different from the current “you” – a member of a different species, someone from a different gender or generation, etc. who would you choose to be?

Many great leaders, sportsmen, actors, singers and scientists have inspired me and I have read their autobiographies and grew up admiring their character, perseverance, integrity and resilience.

However, coming to the question of living their life or mimicking them would be totally impossible for me.  I believe that each of us is unique and we are also shaped by our unique environments, our society, our parents, our teachers and our close friends.  So although we may look up to someone as a role model  it is wrong to draw comparisons or  envy them or dream of coveting their possessions.

More than a new skin, a makeover or cosmetic surgery to create a replica of someone else, what is needed is an inner surgery to examine how we could change our character and our attitude.  Gandhi said : “Be the change that you want to see in the world”.

So I would rather spend the new year being myself but making a purposeful effort to better myself, to take risks, to learn new skills, to  be thankful for what I have  and  to enjoy every day.

Other interesting posts in this category:
1) http://poetrymetronome.wordpress.com/2015/01/02/morgan-freeman/
2) http://007pandas.com/2015/01/01/httpsdailypost-wordpress-comdp_promptnew-skin/
3) http://www.inspiringmax.com/someone-elses-skin/
4) http://thejournalofabeautifulmind.wordpress.com/2015/01/02/the-new-me/
5) http://thephotopig.com/2015/01/01/so-many-choices/
6) http://new2writing.wordpress.com/2015/01/01/step-out-of-the-mirror/
7) http://quirkinessandme.wordpress.com/2015/01/01/no-skin/
8) http://kindlingword.com/2014/12/31/no-reset-needed/
9) https://alotfromlydia.wordpress.com/2015/01/01/who-to-be-this-year/
10) http://www.gypsysjourneys.com/mirror-mirror/

Advertisement

Avant garde

From your musical tastes to your political views, were you ever way ahead of the rest of us, adopting the new and the emerging before everyone else?

We can never get over this habit of comparing ourselves with the rest of the world.  There are those who take pride in conforming to popular beliefs and opinions whereas there are others who ride the high horse by claiming that they stand out from the crowd and are unique.

As individuals we can celebrate our uniqueness, our choices and we don’t have to care if we are avant garde or conservative.

All our life we cannot be looking for references and yardsticks else we can never find new ways of doing things or think out of the box.

Tall and short
Beautiful and ugly
Thin and fat
Rich and poor

We compare and contrast
In this dilemma of choice
Our life is ruled
By pairs of opposites

Will there be day without night?
Would we know good without evil?
How can there be spring without autumn?
Would the rich exist without the poor?

We play with illusion
Our senses run amock
When will we see the truth?
The real from the unreal

© copyright skm, March 20th, 2011

Other interesting posts in this category:
1) http://lemonlimefollies.com/2014/10/15/en-garde/
2) http://macbofisbil.com/2014/10/15/non-conformist/
3) http://tidlidim.wordpress.com/2014/10/15/daily-prompt-avant-garde/
4) http://tombalistreri.wordpress.com/2014/10/15/ahead-of-my-mind/
5) http://lindaswritingblog.wordpress.com/2014/10/15/old-school/
6) http://vexingpoint.wordpress.com/2014/10/15/daily-prompt-avant-garde/
7) http://movingtowardsthelight.com/2014/10/15/avant-garde/
8) http://fibercompulsion.com/2014/10/15/okay-so-im-weird/
9) http://linusfernandes.com/2014/10/15/avant-garde-johnny-come-lately/
10) http://bobbeck1600.wordpress.com/2014/10/15/daily-post-avant-garde/

Are we born to complain!

When a child screams you can put a pacifier in it s mouth but when an adult complains what do you do?

For a child – they have no way of expressing their basic need/pain.. so they cry for milk, for food or if they want some toy..  or sometimes just to get your attention!

We don’t have to find a reason to complain.  Early morning when we wake up – we whine –“The water is too cold”

If it rains, we complain of too  much water, flooding etc  If its hot and sunny we complain its stuffy and sweaty.

At breakfast the husband complains  to his  wife –“The tea tastes bitter” or at lunch – “. the food is tasteless”

The father complains to the  child: “Why don’t  you do your homework without watching TV all day”

And the employee complains to the boss:

“Sir – the work is too much – I desperately need a raise”

(To which the Boss will reply–“ the company is running a loss because of people like you – go and do your job before I fire you”)

For a teenager eg. A boy on a date – he complains because he wants the perfect girl – too short  – mmm mmm, too tall mm mm , too fat mmm mmm , too thin mm mmm – must be 36 – 24 – 36, long hair, fair, not too tall – not too short … I wonder if scientists can genetically produce such a female

We complain because our  wife sends us  to buy  groceries.

Housing – we need a home near the MRT, near a food court,. If it is near an old age home or a rubbish dump – we get a chance to complain.

Our trains – we complain that we are packed like sardines

Sometimes we complain because we have too many choices.  If we were told when young… there is only roti prata and you must have it.  There is no choice and if you are hungry you will eat it.

But Singapore is a foodies paradise – you want plain prata, egg prata, murtabak, or icecream prata – you want Adam road nasi lemak or katong laksa.     Now that is a problem.. so we complain!  What to eat!

Come to drinks – we have teh, the si, kopi, kopi o, kopi o kosong, teh tarik, milo, milo kosong, lemon tea, sugarcane juice and ofcourse desserts like bobo cha cha,  ice kacang – the list is so long..again complain!

Singapore is shielded from floods, no tsunami, no hurricanes and no earthquakes. So when there is a small disturbance like a haze we get over reactive and  run to the pharmacy to get the best mask.

If they build a workers dormitory near your home –then we are not happy/  If your maid takes an extra day off and if the rubbish dump is close to your home.

Getting a place in Pri 1 gives parents another chance to bicker.

 

“We can complain because rose bushes have thorns, or rejoice because thorn bushes have roses.” – Abraham Lincoln

A matter of choice

“I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I –
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference”

These are the concluding lines of Robert Frost’s poem – The Road not Taken.
We are presented with choices every day of our lives and our decisions lay the blueprint of our future.  So, isn’t choosing a fine art?  Do we allow our emotions to rule when we make our choices or do we go by logic?

I just finished reading a great book “The Art of Choosing” – by Sheena Iyengar.  I found this book very informative and well-researched.  It describes in great detail how culture, upbringing etc influence our everyday choices

Some choices that we encounter do not matter too much as we are not in a life/death situation.  But in life, we are presented with choices like ‘abortion’, ‘euthanasia’ etc.  Here, even consulting experts or our parents is not a solution as even after making such a choice,  we may have to live with guilt if we have not given enough thought in our decision.

The senses of children today are bombarded with videos and sound through gadgets like smartphones, tablets, televisions etc.  They are overwhelmed with media and do not have a chance to look at books and board games, unless, parents can guide them.  So is too much choice necessarily good?

In India arranged marriage is very common.  But if you tell that to a foreigner they will show be taken by surprise.  Why do we sometimes make choices against our best interests? Or are some choices driven by family, society, culture rather than one’s own interests?

Statistics does show that the success of arranged marriages is way higher than love marriage.  One reason is that, love and marriage are not the same.  And living together entails a lot of give and take!  We also find very happy couples in both type of marriages.

So is it actually advantageous to have more choices.  Does it mean we have more freedom if we have more choice or do more choices overwhelm us and make us undecisive?

The course we take can decide the future of our career.  The food we eat can decide our health.  We have a choice whether to exercise or relax.  This exciting book with numerous practical, everyday life examples  is a must-read for all of us who face the thrills and tribulations of making choices everyday.

How do you make important choices in your life?

 

(Sheena Iyengar holds degrees from UPenn, The Wharton School of Business, and Stanford University. She is a professor at Columbia University, and a recipient of the Presidential Early Career Award. Her work is regularly cited in periodicals as diverse as Fortune and Time magazines, the NYT and the WSJ, in books such as Blink and The Paradox of Choice.)

 

 

Pairs of Opposites

Tall and short
Beautiful and ugly
Thin and fat
Rich and poor

We compare and contrast
In this dilemma of choice
Our life is ruled
By pairs of opposites

Will there be day without night?
Would we know good without evil?
How can there be spring without autumn?
Would the rich exist without the poor?

We play with illusion
Our senses run amock
When will we see the truth?
The real from the unreal

© copyright skm, March 20th, 2011