Festivus for the Rest of Us
You have been named supreme ruler of the universe. Your first order of business is creating and instituting a holiday or festival in your honor. What day of the year is your holiday? What special events will take place? Describe YOU DAY in as great a detail as you can muster: the special foods we’ll consume, the decorations we’ll use…everything.
Photographers, artists, poets: show us FESTIVE.
Today you have bestowed upon me this rare honour – Master of the Universe. I will do my best to live up to this image by leading you all – my people by upholding the values of truth, integrity and goodwill.
For all your hard work and dedication in the spirit of teamwork, I would like to declare a holiday, a day of celebration – Unity Day on the 2nd of October. I would like you all to celebrate your achievements and wish that you all have a future full of peace, prosperity and happiness.
I will pass a decree that all men and women shall live as equals, special assistance and help will be given to the poor and needy, the handicapped and the disadvantaged among us. I urge you all to come forward and celebrate this day in a spirit of collective endeavour to spread love , happiness and goodwill for the benefit of humankind.
We shall all assemble in the central square where there will be a special feast for all of you – pastas, pizzas, a choice of international spreads, salads, fruits, pastries and desserts to cater to all your tastebuds. We will have games and competitions. All the kings and prime ministers can decorate their countries in the best manner and you and your families will be given colourful attire. There will be prizes for the best programmes by country, best decorations and best food too,
There will be a riot of colours and music and we all will come together to put aside all our differences and celebrate the oneness that binds all of us.
I will lead you all as a friend and guide. I will seek your opininon and consensus on important bills and I would love to see you all exercise full freedom of speech and your rights. May our democracy flourish and be a beacon of hope for other leaders.
I look forward to serving you all in the years ahead and I once again thank you all from the bottom of my heart for bestowing upon me this rare honour.
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